I Forgot the Toilet Paper

“certain things you don’t actually think about until you actually really need them like toilet paper.” -Ronnie Hicks

This is a quote my father told me when I moved back home for the first time since I left home two years ago. We all forget something at one point or another. Whether it be the most minute things or the biggest objects in our lives, some things in our life we just do not think about until we need them. For my dad that is the toilet paper but for me it was my happiness.

I recently stopped and realized that I am a junior in college meaning that in less than a year I am expected to be walking across a stage in my cap and gown shaking hands of dean’s and collegiate professors as I graduate from my university receiving my bachelor’s degree. I am now looking around and thinking that I may be ‘that scared senior’, scrambling for a job because I have not done enough to prepare myself professionally.

I have done a lot with my time during these undergraduate years and have had a laundry list of successes along with some minor setbacks, but through all of that work and determination I am now looking around and asking myself the million dollar question, am I happy? Now of course from the outside looking in I am not doing too bad at all, but honestly after many days and weeks of thinking I am not happy with who I have become because I forgot what matters most, me.

I forgot the toilet paper and am sitting waiting for someone to rescue me from the stall, but instead of waiting for someone to save me I am making a way to save myself. I took on more than I can chew with all of my responsibilities and I am producing less quality work than I would like to see from myself. I have a great resume to show for all of this work but put these awards, leadership positions, and jobs before what is most important my happiness and in connection my health. Note to self; never forget that you are your harshest critic and that you are deserving of saying no, having your best interest at heart, taking time to take care of yourself, and put yourself first.

Thank you for reading.

Yours Truly,

Miles S. Hicks

 

PS. From Dad

Me: Dad I gonna live at home now…

Daddy: Cool, can you take your sister to school tomorrow?

One Reply to “I Forgot the Toilet Paper”

  1. Ah, this post was just too on point. Once again, I feel you about forgetting your own happiness. It’s like being on your own for the first time makes your world SO much bigger, that you want to dive in all the pools possible. Then you realize you barely know how to swim. (At least that was adult hood for me, at first). I’m glad you can realize that your satisfaction is ultimately the most important. Jobs, friends, money, whatever it is, is much less permanent than YOU. So if you aren’t constantly investing in your OWN happiness, the rest will eventually become crap, too.

    Liked by 1 person

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