Failure or Setback?

In life we all experience failures or setbacks. There sometimes is just no way diverting the cold, hard truth that we all are capable of making mistakes whether they be in or out of our control. I have failed many times and suffered great losses in my short life so far but I don’t think that all failures are truly failing. The question is; where do we go from where we are, when we fail?

I recently was let go from a job that I felt that I exceeded at because of my own doing. I made a mistake and suffered the consequences of being asked to leave the company. I felt like my world had shattered and I was broken. I was stressed beyond belief thinking, where do I go from here, what do I do now, and how do I pick up the pieces? Like most people who are fired or laid off these are all questions that we must ask ourselves and because of this we worry, stress out, and in rare occasion even freak out a bit. I remember how it felt when I was deferred from VCU after applying the first time. I remember in high school when I was told even though I was seen as the best candidate that I would not be able to be in a position of leadership that I had worked years for. I remember when I was told that the internship that I plan on working following my undergraduate work would not be interested in me that summer. I say all of this to drive the point home that failure is a fact of life. There is no way around it but we can control how we respond.

I often find the best therapy is reflecting what went wrong (but of course not for too long) and then learning from the mistake and moving forward. Here is a list of 8 Things To Remember When You Fail (So You Can Bounce Back Better Than Before) according to, and I could not agree more with number five where it says, “Failure is a verb, not a noun.”, because you are not the failures or mistakes you produce. It happened, we learn from it and we do our best to try not to fall for the same mistakes and move on to better. Always remember that this is not the end. Stay hopeful.

1. “Even though things didn’t work out the way I wanted, I’m still OK.”

2. “Failure is proof I’m pushing myself to my limits.”

3. “I will focus on the things I can control.”

4. “Failing feels uncomfortable, but I can handle it.”

5. “Failure is a verb, not a noun.”

6. “Failure is an opportunity to sharpen my skills.”

7. “Recovering from failure can make me stronger.”

8. “I’ve overcome tough things before. I can do it again.”

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